General Poems I
Zero Hours 11
In Memory of Tom Carrick 13
Richter Scale 14
First Bike 15
With Andy and Amanda in the Charity Shop 16
Salmon Nets and the Sea 18
Glasgow Close 19
The Spey Wife 21
There it is... 22
James Hogg Poems
Auld Lass 25
Boy Racers 26
The Teapot 27
Thir ir the Steps o Glendearg 29
Cornua Reparabit Phoebe! 32
The Mairriage Stane 35
Souch... 36
General Poems II
Cultyir at Killie Odeon 39
Double Act 40
The Paralytic Games 41
Delighted by a Dallop Outside Dereham 42
A Spider's Web Glazed with Frost 44
Chairm 45
Elegy 46
Salmon at Euchan Falls 47
Burnsiana
Burns Country 51
Portrait of Colin McLuckie 53
Negative Sublime ii (or Portrait of Lord Byron) 55
Blind Ossian 56
Sir Walter Scott 57
Blue Burns 58
Twa Plack 59
General Poems III
Apparatus for Determining the Absolute Om 63
Can `Can'? 64
On the Marriage of Dear Carr to his Beloved Girl 65
Maggie, Maggie, Maggie
I The Lanely Daith o Maggie Thatcher 66
II Maggie's Funeral 67
III Everything Must Go... 69
Bank Robbers 70
Royal and Ancient 71
War Memorial, Afton Valley 72
Roads 73
lermontov
Fareweel Unwasht Russia 77
Ma Kintra 78
The Dagger 79
General Poems IV
Six Swans a Swimming 83
What The Alien Speaks of When he Speaks
of Love 84
Dirty Des 86
Gerry Sells the Jerseys 87
Gallus! 88
Fourteen Coos 89
Lown 90
If I could Just Go Back there Once Again... 91
Im NHS
Martin's Moral Compass 95
Cuid Hae Duin Better 96
A Rhyming Epistle tae Dave Prentis 97
nhs Ayrshire's Garland 102
Leviathan 105
Armistice Day 108
Owersettins
Epilogue 111
Ah wis Deid, Syne Leevin 112
The Tuim Boat 114
The Gowden Boat 116
General Poems V
Desert Island Discs 121
At the Church of the Latter Day Empiricists 122
God's Telephone Number 123
Glenafton 2 Camelon 0 124
Heich Simmer 125
Eftir the Kistin 126
The Auld Toon Schuil 127
Here We Go... 129
Polquhirter 130
Wheel 131
The Christmas Bulbs 134
Equipoise 135
Shards 136
General Poems VI
Paradise Enow! 139
`Seldom Seen' 140
Saint Valentine 141
Jockeys Destroyed! 142
Lang Ling Legammachie 143
Skeely Fowk 144
The Question 145
Rant
Rant 151
The End o the World 152
State of the Nation 155
Hou the First Tory wis Made 158
Promises, Promises... 159
Dave's Hair: The Journey Continues...! 165
Ode to Lord Winston! 169
General Poems VII
The Waithercock 175
Treasuir 176
The Stanes Dwam in the Dykes 177
Multiverse 178
Burnt Sienna and Periwinkle 179
Raxin fir the Dawin 180
Veesion 181
Design 182
The Horseman's Word 183
The Greater Sea 185
Notes to Zero Hours
