Beautifully Unique Sparkleponies by Chris Kluwe

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Beautifully Unique Sparkleponies by Chris Kluwe

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Summary

Minnesota Vikings punter Chris Kluwe's hilarious and uncensored take on society's ills.

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Beautifully Unique Sparkleponies by Chris Kluwe

Hi. In your hands, right now, you hold the culmination of thousands of years of human intelligence, ingenuity, and brilliance. Now put your goddamn phone down and pay attention to my book. What is in my book, you ask? (I'm really glad you asked, by the way, because now I get to tell you.) Time travel. Gay marriage. Sportsballing. Futuristic goggles that DO NOTHING. Tiny brags from my publisher, stuff like: 'This is an uproarious, uncensored take on empathy, personal responsibility, and what it means to be human.' Excessive brags about myself: 'An extraordinarily clever, punishingly funny, sharp-tongued blogosphere star, NFL player, husband and father, one-time violin prodigy, voracious lifetime reader, obsessive gamer, and fearless champion of personal freedom.' Oh, and also an essay on the Pope's Twitter account. Honestly, if that doesn't draw you in, there's no hope left for humanity. I also give my own funeral eulogy, in case you were hoping I'd go away and die now! So please, join me in the glorious art of windmill tilting by reading this 'collection of rousing, uncensored personal essays, letters, and stories' (I have no idea why that's in quotes). Join the herd of Beautifully Unique Sparkleponies. (You know you want to.)
The most interesting man in the NF.L. - The New York Times

In a league (and sports climate) which has become one, long, repetitive sound bite, a guy who will actually say something meaningful. - BleacherReport.com

Chris Kluwe is a glimmering sparklepony of candor (and not afraid to dive fearlessly into the marriage equality debate). - Mother Jones
Chris Kluwe grew up in Southern California among a colony of wild chinchillas and didn't learn how to communicate outside of barking and howling until he was fourteen years old. He has played football in the NFL, once wrestled a bear for a pot of gold, and lies occasionally. He is also the eternal disappointment of his mother, who just can't understand why he hasn't cured cancer yet. Do you know why these bio things are in third person? I have no idea. Please tell me if you figure it out.
SKU Unavailable
ISBN 13 9780316236775
ISBN 10 0316236772
Title Beautifully Unique Sparkleponies
Author Chris Kluwe
Condition Unavailable
Binding Type Hardback
Publisher Little, Brown & Company
Year published 2013-08-29
Number of pages 272
Cover note Book picture is for illustrative purposes only, actual binding, cover or edition may vary.