The Mummy Lessons by Helen Wallen

The Mummy Lessons by Helen Wallen

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Summary

The award winning 'Just A Normal Mummy' blogger returns with another frank and hilarious novel on those first twelve months of motherhood.

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The Mummy Lessons by Helen Wallen

THE RULES 1) Try to sleep when the baby sleeps. (SO NEVER. EVER. UNTIL YOU ARE AN EMPTY WINE-SOAKED HUSK AND FALL DOWN DEAD IN THE BABY AISLE AT TESCO) 2) Try to eat when the baby sleeps. (SEE POINT ABOVE) 3) Try to get basic household chores done when the baby sleeps. (ABOVE!!) 4) Batch cook food and freeze in individual portions for easy re-heating. (OR DELIVEROO . . . WITH WINE. AND CRYING) 5) Try hiring a cleaner to take the pressure off. (OR JUST USE BABY WIPES) 6) Take time to shower or bathe in the evenings when you can leave the baby with your partner. (OR JUST USE BABY WIPES) 7) Make tea or coffee in the Thermos so it stays hot. (WHAT IS THIS 'HOT' OF WHICH YOU SPEAK?!) 8) Don't be afraid to ask for help, or ask people to leave. (COMMUNICATION VIA WHATSAPP ONLY) 9) Remember to look after and take time for yourself. (AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA) After a tough pregnancy, Emily is determined to tackle motherhood like a pro. But she quickly learns that Insta-Perfect-Parenting (and sleep) is hard to come by, no matter how much money you spend in Mothercare. Irritatingly, her friend Molly seems to be breezing it. But with a business venture as well as a baby, is she taking on too much? Liz looks as though she might have it all worked out. But when a tragedy derails her new relationship, she has some serious decisions to make. Celebrating female friendship, the highs and lows of motherhood, and the lifesaving power of a jumperoo, THE MUMMY LESSONS follows a year of highs and lows for Emily, Molly and Liz as they learn the hardest lesson of all: life doesn't always follow the rules . . . *********** What readers are saying about Helen Wallen's BABY BOOM! 'Funny, sweet, real and relatable. Couldn't put it down.' 'Hilarious, witty and so easy to get lost in! This book shows the real life before and after your baby has been born!' 'Loved it! Great read for mums and dads who want to keep it real!' 'If you've had kids, you'll laugh out loud!' 'Fantastic!!! I couldn't put this book down'
Praise for Baby Boom! - :

Perfect for new mums, soon-to-be mums - and dads! - Soap Magazine

Helen Wallen is a blogger, funny lady, mother of two, and all round gin, wine and cake enthusiast. Formerly a copywriter/PR-type person, she is now dedicated to growing human-beings in her uterus and blogging about life with babies, toddlers and beyond.

Helen's award winning 'Just a Normal Mummy' blog is the inspiration and basis for her first witty, and hilariously honest, debut fiction title BABY BOOM!

SKU Unavailable
ISBN 13 9781473691360
ISBN 10 1473691362
Title The Mummy Lessons
Author Helen Wallen
Condition Unavailable
Binding Type Paperback
Publisher Hodder & Stoughton
Year published 2019-03-21
Number of pages 464
Cover note Book picture is for illustrative purposes only, actual binding, cover or edition may vary.