When the second waxe of feminism reached a peak in the late 1960s, its most ardent rallying cry was that a woman had the right to shape her own destiny. Not only was it wrong to be co-erced into motherhood, it was also wrong to give up work in order to have children - or go without them in order to work. How helpful have the feminist thinkers been? Where is the practical thinking on mothering? Not mother as ogre or mother as victim, or as a dupe who neglected to explore her options and capitulated to the enemy. What about the mothers as they really exist, mothers who mother and balance budgets and work, and are in need of childcare and protection under employment law? This work explores why feminism has difficulty meeting the needs of women who have children, and why women with children have such a hard time when they try to put feminist ideas into practice.